A Great Dane in Illinois has been officially recognized by Guinness as the world's tallest female dog, standing 5'11'' on her hind legs. Weighing over 150 pounds, Nova eats more than 30 pounds of food a week and sleeps with her owner in her queen-sized bed. 10/3/11 1:04pm ET
You'd have to be careful in that bed, with the lights out.
A NASA satellite on the verge of falling back to Earth appears to have begun slowing down and will not re-enter the atmosphere until late Friday or early Saturday U.S. time. The United States is once again an unlikely but potential target for the 26 pieces of the Upper Atmosphere Research Satellite, expected to weigh from ten to hundreds of pounds each. 9/23/11 3:20pm ET
At Facebook's f8 conference in San Francisco today, CEO Mark Zuckerberg unveiled the next evolution of the service, including an overhaul to the user profile called ''Timeline,'' which he called ''the story of your life.'' Timeline is a more visual profile that lets users highlight the key moments of their lives outside their everyday updates. 9/22/11 4:44pm ET
Zuckerberg's timeline reads. Bagged some chicks, made some cash, now what?
Zoos in Milwaukee, Phoenix, Atlanta, and Toronto have agreed to participate in a program that will allow orangutans to use iPads and social media services to connect with one another, become 'friends', and have primate playdates, right from their cages. 9/12/11 2:42pm ET
Great plan for the male orangutans. After all Internet social interaction with younger woman already works well for fat fingered overweight hairy men.
After years of debate, scientists finally agree that the female orgasm exists. Now the question is why? There's no evidence that female orgasms are an evolutionary adaptation. If they were, they'd be easier to attain. Furthermore, many women require clitoral stimulation to achieve orgasm, not penetration, which would be more important to evolution. 9/7/11 3:02pm ET
It's ugly enough that Scientists have been mass-debating for years about woman's orgasm. Now they agree, they must have put down the magazine and just discovered the Internet.
Divorced vintage fashionistas everywhere can thank jewelers Spritzer and Furman for their 18-karat gold split heart ring, which was created in the 1970s for newly unmarried women. It can be yours on the 1stdibs website for just $3,200. 9/2/11 2:50pm ET
Are you kidding, two dudes named Spritz and Furman make a ring looking like a broken vagina, is it April 1st already?
A business owner in Las Vegas has created a life-sized sandbox for adults, who pay up to $750 each to push around dirt, rock, and huge tires with earth-moving construction equipment. All it takes is a 10-minute classroom lesson and guidance from trainers through headsets. 9/2/11 3:59pm ET
Finally a chance for the skinny white guy to kick sand in someone's face.
They're both from Long Island, they're both terrible drivers, and now Lindsay Lohan and Billy Joel share something else: his lyrics next to her tit. Lohan recently went to Shamrock Tattoos in L.A. and got the following couplet from Joel's 1989 hit ''I Go to Extremes'' inked on her ribcage: ''Clear as a crystal, sharp as a knife. I feel like I'm in the prime of my life.'' 9/1/11 3:35pm ET
The tattoo was 2nd on her list after Gaga took the prosthetic penis.
Pop provocateur Lady Gaga (real name: Stephanie Germanotta) didn't just wear men's clothing and fake stubble to MTV's Video Music Awards. To complete the her ''drag king'' transformation into male alter ego Jo Calderone, Gaga also wore a prosthetic penis. 8/31/11 2:39pm ET
Anthony Weiner said to Gaga, trust me it's a crowd-pleaser.
Prostitution is a legal and taxable trade in Germany, but enforcing taxes among sex workers on the street can be problematic. The city of Bonn has come up with a new solution, though. Prostitutes must now pay a nightly tax to automated ticket machines. 8/31/11 4:23pm ET
German hookers, I hope they issue infringement notices for those unifit to ride.
Up until a few years ago, scientists thought that Neanderthals and modern humans had never mated. Now scientists believe that not only did they mate, but that humans also may have inherited key versions of immune system genes from the Neanderthals. 8/30/11 5:33pm ET
The Neanderthal man or the modern woman, wonder who was on top?
In a new variation on the ''brick in a box'' scam, a 22-year-old South Carolina woman who thought she purchased an iPad from two men in a McDonald's parking lot discovered when she got home that it was actually ''a piece of wood painted black with an Apple logo.'' 8/30/11 6:09pm ET
Unlike the woman, the iPad was as thin as two short planks.
Last week, the FDA approved Botox (botulinum toxin) to treat urinary incontinence in patients with neurological conditions like spinal cord injury and multiple sclerosis. By injecting Botox directly into the bladder to relax it, patients have more muscle control and fewer incidents. 8/29/11 1:25pm ET
The sight of a needle, aimed down there, is enough to tighten any bladder.
Researchers from Columbia University are projecting that if the current obesity epidemic continues unchecked, 50% of the U.S. adult population will be obese by 2030, and the rate of obesity in men and women in their 40s and 50s will approach 60%. 8/29/11 3:10pm ET
Wow by 2030, I thought we had a few more days to go.
Even after centuries of effort, some 86% of Earth's species have yet to be fully described, according to new study that predicts our planet is home to 8.7 million species. So far, some 1.2 million species are known to science, and the researchers say they were able to calculate the number of unknown species (7.5 million) using ''complex statistics.'' 8/25/11 7:13pm ET
The researchers now need funding to find their undiscovered, unknown species; we expect this to also involve complex statistics.
Felonious, hypersexual people just can't stop crashing into the AdultMart of Brownhelm Township, Ohio to steal sex toys! In the latest incident involving theft at the popular sex-stablishment, a man stole a semi and crashed it into the place, making off with a $800 ''life-like masturbator complete with female genitalia with legs and buttocks.'' 8/24/11 5:36pm ET
Gotta feel sorry for him; the toy has all the bits, it can't speak, it's cheaper than a wedding ring and all the guy has is a semi?
A viral video making the rounds shows two researchers from cyber-security firm iSEC Partners breaking into a 1998 Subaru Outback via their PC. In less than 60 seconds, they wirelessly find the car's security system module, bypass it, and start the engine remotely. 8/23/11 4:30pm ET
They first tried to break into the Prius but couldn't find one that anyone bothered to lock.
A new paper by researchers at Penn State says an extraterrestrial civilization might notice our planet by detecting changes in the spectral signature of Earth (the light radiated by our planet and atmosphere) caused by greenhouse gas emissions. Then deducing the reason to be our rapid expansion and viewing us as a threat to their resources, they might destroy us. 8/22/11 8:23pm ET
This is great; I can't wait for the movie to come out.
According to a recent study, one in four men believe in love at first sight and know whether a girl is 'the one' within seconds. By contrast, women are more indecisive on the issue, waiting until at least the sixth date before making their mind up. 8/22/11 6:18pm ET
As hot as Justin Bieber is in America, he appears to be even mas caliente in Mexico. Teen girls who weren't able to score tickets to his upcoming concert there the old fashioned way are reportedly trying to score them the even older fashioned way: by offering up their virginity. 8/19/11 1:01pm ET
Justin Bieber and virginity are similar; both are one hit wonders and afterwards you wish you hadn't.