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gutfest89
Humpty Town
Joined: Feb '11
Club Regular
Level 8: Club Regular
Next Level: Improv All-Star
  Kwips Points Average
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gutfest89's kwips: 82
Brad Pitt to Retire from Acting in 3 Years
60 Minutes
In an interview with Australia's '60 Minutes' this weekend, Brad Pitt (47) said he plans to retire from acting in 3 years. After that? ''Hell if I know. I am really enjoying the producing side and development of stories and putting those pieces together. And getting stories to the plate that might have had a tougher time otherwise.'' [VIDEO] 11/14/11 10:45am ET
gutfest89
Guess those daycare bills can really add up.
11/14/11 10:53am ET
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Brad Pitt to Retire from Acting in 3 Years
60 Minutes
In an interview with Australia's '60 Minutes' this weekend, Brad Pitt (47) said he plans to retire from acting in 3 years. After that? ''Hell if I know. I am really enjoying the producing side and development of stories and putting those pieces together. And getting stories to the plate that might have had a tougher time otherwise.'' [VIDEO] 11/14/11 10:45am ET
gutfest89
After that? "Hell if I know. Oh yeah -- I'll have sex with Angelina Jolie."
11/14/11 10:51am ET
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Detroit Lions Fans Protest Nickelback Halftime Show
A.V. Club
A group of Detroit Lions fans have banded together to circulate a petition to replace Nickelback as the halftime entertainment at the NFL team's annual Thanksgiving game in the Motor City. As of this posting, over 50,000 fans have signed the online petition. 11/9/11 1:51pm ET
gutfest89
The only people more opposed to Nickelback playing a show in Detroit? Nickelback.
11/9/11 2:00pm ET
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Detroit Lions Fans Protest Nickelback Halftime Show
A.V. Club
A group of Detroit Lions fans have banded together to circulate a petition to replace Nickelback as the halftime entertainment at the NFL team's annual Thanksgiving game in the Motor City. As of this posting, over 50,000 fans have signed the online petition. 11/9/11 1:51pm ET
gutfest89
This can't be true. Over 50,000 people in Detroit have internet?
11/9/11 1:59pm ET
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Woman Steals 26 Boxes of Condoms, Ovulation Test
Atlanta Journal-Constitution
According to Georgia police, a woman identified as Alexandrea Brooks infiltrated a Walgreens in Marietta last month and made off with 26 boxes of condoms, an ovulation test, and a box of Huggies baby wipes. The total value of her score: $562.68. 10/25/11 5:12pm ET
gutfest89
Smart move on throwing in the ovulation test. Because when you've only got 26 boxes of condoms, you wanna make sure you don't waste any.
10/25/11 5:34pm ET
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Brothers Steal Bridge, Sell for Scrap
Digital Journal
Two brothers have been arrested for dismantling, stealing, and selling the Covert's Crossing Bridge, a rarely used crossing in rural Pennsylvania. The brothers (24,25) used a blowtorch to disassemble the 15-ton, 50' by 20' structure, then sold the pieces for $5,000 to a scrap metal company, which later reported the suspicious transaction to police. 10/17/11 4:20pm ET
gutfest89
The brothers have plead inbred.
10/17/11 4:36pm ET
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Brothers Steal Bridge, Sell for Scrap
Digital Journal
Two brothers have been arrested for dismantling, stealing, and selling the Covert's Crossing Bridge, a rarely used crossing in rural Pennsylvania. The brothers (24,25) used a blowtorch to disassemble the 15-ton, 50' by 20' structure, then sold the pieces for $5,000 to a scrap metal company, which later reported the suspicious transaction to police. 10/17/11 4:20pm ET
gutfest89
The brothers have been charged with conspiracy, criminal mischief, and stealing a fucking bridge.
10/17/11 4:33pm ET
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Pastor's Wife Admits to Spitting on 'Family Feud'
BuzzerBlog
On a recent episode of 'Family Feud,' a seemingly innocent pastor's wife stunned the audience into silence with her response to the following question: ''Name something you put in your mouth but don't swallow.'' Her answer: sperm. [VIDEO] 10/17/11 2:04pm ET
gutfest89
The Family Feud is still on? I had no idea. Oh, now I know why.... It must be on The Playboy Channel.
10/17/11 2:43pm ET
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Pastor's Wife Admits to Spitting on 'Family Feud'
BuzzerBlog
On a recent episode of 'Family Feud,' a seemingly innocent pastor's wife stunned the audience into silence with her response to the following question: ''Name something you put in your mouth but don't swallow.'' Her answer: sperm. [VIDEO] 10/17/11 2:04pm ET
gutfest89
Bad news: her answer didn't make the board. Good news: her answer didn't make the board.
10/17/11 2:42pm ET
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U.S. Panel Says Prostate Exams Not Necessary
CNN
The U.S. Preventive Services Task Force will soon recommend that men not get screened for prostate cancer. A review of studies shows screening with the prostate specific antigen (PSA) blood test results in ''small or no reduction'' in prostate cancer deaths. Their report adds that PSA testing is ''associated with harms related to subsequent evaluation and treatments.'' 10/7/11 12:15pm ET
gutfest89
First they say no mammograms, now they say no prostate exams? Clearly they're hoping this will encourage couples to perform their own exams at home.
10/7/11 1:30pm ET
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Japan Debuts Poop-Powered Motorbike
TreeHugger
Japan's biggest toilet maker, TOTO, is taking the toilet on the road with its launch of the Toilet Bike Neo, a bike that's powered entirely by human waste. The bike runs on biogas converted from feces that is harvested directly from the driver -- who sits on the bike's toilet-styled seat. The bike also uses residual light imagery to write messages in the air as it zooms by. 10/7/11 1:23pm ET
gutfest89
Considering its fuel source, its range is fairly limited -- with the exception of trips to Taco Bell.
10/7/11 1:28pm ET
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Japan Debuts Poop-Powered Motorbike
TreeHugger
Japan's biggest toilet maker, TOTO, is taking the toilet on the road with its launch of the Toilet Bike Neo, a bike that's powered entirely by human waste. The bike runs on biogas converted from feces that is harvested directly from the driver -- who sits on the bike's toilet-styled seat. The bike also uses residual light imagery to write messages in the air as it zooms by. 10/7/11 1:23pm ET
gutfest89
The bike also uses residual light imagery to write messages in the air as it zooms by. Such as: "You might wanna drive ahead of me."
10/7/11 1:27pm ET
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Florida Rep Wants to Repeal Dwarf-Tossing Ban
Gawker
As part of his ''quest to seek and destroy unnecessary burdens on the freedom and liberties of people'' -- and to create new jobs -- Florida state Rep. Ritch Workman (R) has submitted a bill to repeal Florida's 22-year-old ban on tossing little people for sport at bars. 10/6/11 5:05pm ET
gutfest89
Ah yes, 1989. The darkest year for dwarfs since the Great Depression.
10/6/11 5:17pm ET
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Florida Rep Wants to Repeal Dwarf-Tossing Ban
Gawker
As part of his ''quest to seek and destroy unnecessary burdens on the freedom and liberties of people'' -- and to create new jobs -- Florida state Rep. Ritch Workman (R) has submitted a bill to repeal Florida's 22-year-old ban on tossing little people for sport at bars. 10/6/11 5:05pm ET
gutfest89
Several little people objected to the bill, but unfortunately nobody could see them raise their hands.
10/6/11 5:14pm ET
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Axl Rose Has Let Himself Go
Uproxx
Guns N' Roses -- minus legendary guitarists Slash and Duff McKagan -- kicked off a world tour in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil on Sunday night, and let's just say that lead singer Axl Rose looks like he prepared for the tour by eating a Krispy Kreme shop. [VIDEO] 10/6/11 2:52pm ET
gutfest89
Looks like an audition tape to replace Chris Farley in the superfans.
10/6/11 3:25pm ET
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Axl Rose Has Let Himself Go
Uproxx
Guns N' Roses -- minus legendary guitarists Slash and Duff McKagan -- kicked off a world tour in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil on Sunday night, and let's just say that lead singer Axl Rose looks like he prepared for the tour by eating a Krispy Kreme shop. [VIDEO] 10/6/11 2:52pm ET
gutfest89
Looks like he's developed an appetite for more than destruction.
10/6/11 2:59pm ET
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Jason Biggs' Wife Bought Him Blow Job for Birthday
FilmDrunk
'American Pie' star Jason Biggs appears to have a wife. And for his 33rd birthday, she (Jenny Mollen) hired a hooker to give him a blow job -- so she didn't have to do it herself. Through a friend, Mrs. Pie was able to find a ''massage therapist,'' who $600 later was fellating his semi-erect penis -- and inspiring her to write 3,300 words about it for a Playboy website. 10/6/11 2:06pm ET
gutfest89
Even sadder: the massage therapist was Shannon Elizabeth.
10/6/11 2:49pm ET
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Wall Street Protests Go Nationwide
CNN
The spirited and leaderless Occupy: Wall Street movement has entered its third week in New York, as activists continue to vent their frustrations with everything from corporate greed to high gas prices to insufficient health insurance. Similar efforts have also sprung up in Boston, Chicago, Los Angeles, and Seattle, united in their passion if not necessarily their reasons. 10/3/11 3:36pm ET
gutfest89
The protesters may have different reasons for being there, but they're united in their stance against corporate greed. At least that's what most of them told me on their iPhones.
10/5/11 9:20pm ET
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World Population to Hit 7 Billion On Halloween
The Huffington Post
Expect more than tricks and treats on Halloween this year. On October 31st, the world will welcome its 7 billionth person, according to the United Nations Population Fund. 9/30/11 3:54pm ET
gutfest89
Time to sell.
10/5/11 9:17pm ET
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Woman Left With Uniboob After Botched Procedure
The Gloss
40-year-old Dinora Rodriguez's boob job was beginning to leak, so she went in for a repair. But the surgeon, who she later found out wasn't board certified, put her new implants so close together that they touched, leaving her with a uniboob. He also performed eyelid surgery on her without her consent, and now she can't close her eyes. 9/30/11 4:57pm ET
gutfest89
Well at least it'll save her some money. Bras are much more expensive than jock straps.
10/5/11 9:16pm ET
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